Measuring up – or down – or whatever

Steve Jobs once said, “Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else´s life.”

That Steve was a smart guy. Wonder if he ever made anything of himself.

Anyway, of all the things he’s credited with saying, for me those words stand out above all the rest.

To all of you trying to live someone else’s life, here’s my challenge to you – live your own life. Stop comparing your body, your kids, your house, your life to anyone else’s.

I have friends who’s homes look like something out of Southern Living. My sister Tara’s family always looks like they’re just wrapping up a JCrew ad. My friend Trixia posts food so tempting I’ve considering asking her to adopt me. My friend Brenda is so enduringly gentle and soft-spoken I feel like a toddler jacked up on Pixie Stix and Mountain Dew next to her.

That used to bother me. Like a lot. Like a lot a lot. I’d clean like a mad woman before people came over. I’d constantly overthink what I’d wear when I went home to see family. I’d insist everything I served my guests was from scratch and on matching, carefully plated dishes. I turned down invitations and let relationships fade because of my insecurities. I never did master the gentle or soft spoken thing. I still only have two settings – silent and oh-my-gosh-my-ears-are-bleeding.

One of the things about getting older is that stuff starts to matter a lot less. Not one of those people I listed cares what my house looks like, what I wear, if the cookies are from scratch or from Costco. Pretty sure they have an opinion on the shout-y part, but because we’re friends they let it go.

Stop comparing. Stop envying. Stop wishing you had someone else’s life.

All you’re doing is wasting your own.

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